I was overwhelmed and foggy. Forgetting things left and right.
A bit grumpy and just generally meh.
I was on my way to the car to go to weekly yoga class and had been rushing all day. Those few steps from house to car, the air hit me forcefully and my being longed to breathe more of it. I had been inside too much lately. I got in the car but heard a loud voice saying, air, air, air. So I got out, I ditched yoga, I breathed the evening air and walked.
I had listened to myself. That alone felt like the first step in the reclaiming of my needs and my voice and myself through the foggy week of overwhelm.
I walked on, still in a blur. I vowed not to look at or use my phone at all unless it got too dark and I needed a flash light. I called in my higher self and she with her ever present warmth and trust in me, just said "walk on." So I walked, silently opening to whatever was needed.
I wasn't demanding or forcing. I wasn't desperate for some answer or another. I just wanted to walk and to breathe. And in that breathing a tool found me. Yes, it found me because I was open. I imagined my bubble of energy around me. I let the room I take up feel spacious and light. The bubble stayed with me block after block after block. The word spacious just kept coming into mind. That was it. It was simple and it was enough.
This morning by the time work was beginning I noticed how spacious the day felt so far. Really there was nothing different about this morning in the family shuffle of get up, get the kid fed and perform his respiration therapy, make lunch, drink tea, etc. but somehow it just felt spacious and again my journey last night was affirmed.
And then today just keeps flowing. Flowing energy toward me instead of me shoveling energy out.
It was in that most simple act of pausing long enough to listen and then actually following through on what I was hearing from within that shifted a whole week's worth of energy for me. I heard "air" and was about to ignore it but instead I followed it. It wasn't some big event or cleanse or journey. It was a simple listening and honoring. Opening and allowing. It was easy and it was enjoyable.
So now it's your turn. What is your inner being trying to communicate with you? Are you willing to listen to it for a couple of minutes today or tomorrow? Are you willing to honor the message it has even though you're used to ignoring it or pushing it away for later? Are you willing to stop ignoring it and risk listening to it instead? Will you be open and invite in what you need instead of pushing and hefting the load up the hill one more day or week?
I challenge you to honor one of the sweet callings of your inner voice this week. I challenge you to follow it through like a child would. With complete openness, no expectation and a wondrous eye. Be open to what's in store for you without the plan or the list. Be open without the fog and grind. At least one time this week. Follow the call.
PS. If you're reading this and thinking, "well my inner voice doesn't ever say anything to me," then even more listen, look, notice, feel. See if you can find that voice somewhere hidden amongst the weeds. It's there, I 1000% promise you.
PPS. YOU'RE INVITED!! I just opened up the doors to my BRAND NEW VIRTUAL RETREAT. If you are ready to trust yourself, be kind to yourself and finally know that you are enough no matter what you are doing, this is your chance. Walk away connected to your higher self and your kinder self(together we'll figure out who that even is......she's in there for sure!!). Email me with any questions you have at all. All the details here.